Subject: Activities » Shopping (Page 3)

People will buy anything that's one to a customer.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

If you go to Bed Bath & Beyond without a coupon, people will wonder if you’re OK.

(1964 – 2014) American actor, Broadway performer & stand-up comedian
Activities Shopping

Never try to guess your wife's size. Just buy her anything marked ‘petite’ and hold on to the receipt.

Appearance Body Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

If you need n items of anything, you will have n – 1 in stock.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

He hasn’t an enemy in the world – but all his friends hate him.

(1892 – 1964) singer, dancer, comedian, actor & songwriter
Friends Insults People Shopping

One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Money People Shopping Women

I went to a record store, they said they specialized in hard-to-find records… nothing was alphabetized!

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Shopping Situations

I liked Amsterdam… I spent $2,000 window shopping.

(1957 – ) American comedian
Places Sex Shopping

The label "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" means the price went up.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

The slowest checker is always at the quick-check-out lane.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

I love Mexico because it’s a giant dollar store.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Places Shopping

Suzanne: I never use catalogs. I’d rather go in the store and see all the salespeople groveling and sucking up to you.

Julia: Pardon me, I never knew they were so solicitous at the K-Mart.

(1939 – 2010) American actress
Activities Shopping TV/Movie Quotes

Consumer: One who delights advertisers by acquiring unnecessary products.

Definitions Shopping

Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Activities Beliefs Religion Shopping

There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Husbands Marriage Shopping Wives

In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.

America Murphy’s Laws Shopping

The first time you go out after your wife’s birthday, you will see the gift you gave her marked down fifty percent.
Corollary: If she’s with you, she’ll assume you chose it because it was cheap.

Husbands Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Wives

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping; men invade another country.

(1952 – ) comedian
Eating Men People Shopping War Women

The other line moves faster.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Shopping

Thank God we’re living in a country where the sky’s the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Activities Shopping

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Old Shopping