Subject: Age

Pushing forty? … she's hanging on for dear life.

(1884 – 1969) English novelist

At my age, patience is not a virtue… it’s a luxury.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist

I am a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn’t have the heart to let him down.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president

A man has more character in his face at forty than at twenty… he has suffered longer.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

I’ll never make the mistake of being 70 again.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host

Senility: The pleasantly rueful experience of forgetting what we’ve forgotten.

My son is 21… he’ll be 22 if I let him.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian

Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

The young feel tired at the end of an action; the old at the beginning.

(1888 – 1965) British (US-born) critic, dramatist & poet

Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty… but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress

He’s 31 this year – last year he was 30.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator

I’d like to grow very old as slowly as possible.

(1907 - 1990) American theatrical producer

Sex at 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Before borrowing from a friend, decide which you need most.

You want to look younger… rent smaller children.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else… and usually is.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet

If you eat one apple a day for 80 years, you won't die young.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter

The moment you're born you're done for.

1867 – 1931) English novelist

That man so old… he’s older than his birthday.

(1894 – 1975) American comedian

Retire? … I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer