Subject: Age (Page 27)

Old age is like everything else; to make a success of it, you’ve got to start young.

(1899 – 1987) American dancer, choreographer, singer, musician & actor

The only good thing about [aging] is you’re not dead.

(1905 –1984) American playwright

I've only got one wrinkle and I'm sitting on it.

(1875 – 1997) French, 120 year old woman

Whatever happened to the good old days when kids was scared to death of their parents?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)

At my age flowers scare me.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Ask any woman her age, and nine times out of ten she’ll guess wrong.

comedian

I ask myself questions in those stores I don't ask myself anywhere else, like, 'Will I live long enough to use all those paper towels?'

American comedian & musician

The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

Adolescence: A period in which children begin to question the answers.

There are only two things a child will share willingly – communicable diseases and his mother’s age.

(1903 – 1998) American pediatrician & author

I was getting dressed and a peeping Tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

I'm in a restaurant one time, we go to the men's room – my grandfather was standing by the condom machine going, 'Hey, this gum has got no flavor.'

American comedian & actor

Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they lose their feelings.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

Oh, to be seventy again.

(1841 – 1929) French statesman, physician & journalist

There never was a child so lovely, but his mother was glad to get him asleep.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher

Sometimes I feel that I’m not just aging… I’m decomposing.

(1949 – ) American federal judge
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