Subject: Age » Young

It is better to waste one’s youth than to do nothing with it at all.

(1858 – 1929) French dramatist, novelist & satirist
Age Young

One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger" … every picture of you is of when you were younger.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Age Young

When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, "Do you have any toy train schedules?"

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Young

My secret to staying young… having no sense of time.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Time Young

When I was little, my grandfather used to make me stand in a closet for five minutes without moving… he said it was elevator practice.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Family Things Young

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become president… now I'm beginning to believe it.

(1857 – 1938) American lawyer
Age Government President Young

Everybody wants to live forever, but nobody wants to grow old.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Age Old Young

The young are always ready to give to those who are older than themselves the full benefits of their inexperience.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Age Young

Old age is like everything else; to make a success of it, you've got to start young.

(1858 – 1919) 26th U.S. president
Age Old Success Young

Younger Generation: A group that is alike in many disrespects.

Age Definitions People Young

Money can’t buy friends, but it can get you a better class of enemy.

(1918 – 2002) Irish comedian, writer, musician, poet & playwright
Friends Money People Young

When I was young I used to think that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old, I know it is.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Age Life Money Young

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

Age Intelligence Old Young

Younger and younger, our children are seeing the sippy-cup as half empty.

(1970 – ) American stand-up comedian & voice actor
Age Young

When I was in high school, a “drive-by shooting” meant someone had their rear end hanging out a car window!

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities Age Young

I was born when my dad was 50; it’s weird growing up with a dad that much older than you… we’d go to the movies, we’re both getting discounts.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Age Family Fathers Old Young

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Age Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Young

Whatever a parent does is wrong.

Failure Family Murphy’s Laws Parents Problems Young

You know your girlfriend is too young when she’ll do everything in bed but go upside down because it’s too scary.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Age Girlfriends Sex Young

When you are eight years old, nothing is any of your business.

(1923 – 1966) stand-up comedian, writer, social critic & satirist
Age Young

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve; middle age is when you're forced to.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Age Old Young