Subject: Age » Young

Younger Generation: A group that is alike in many disrespects.

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

Young people should be helped, sheltered, ignored, and clubbed if necessary.

(1909 – 1979) American cartoonist (Li'l Abner)

When you are eight years old, nothing is any of your business.

(1923 – 1966) stand-up comedian, writer, social critic & satirist

I can do some things now that I couldn't do when I was 17, like date high school girls.

(1940 – ) American stand-up comedian

There are three terrible ages of childhood – 1 to 10, 10 to 20, and 20 to 30.

(1917 – 1998) author, critic, animal rights activist

When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

They told me my services were no longer desired because they wanted to put in a youth program as an advance way of keeping the club going; I'll never make the mistake of being seventy again.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

You know, you get that tattoo of barbed wire when you’re 18, but by the time you’re 80, it’s a picket fence.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor

When I was young, poverty was so common that we didn't know it had a name.

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist

Youth: A good substitute for experience.

Old age is like everything else; to make a success of it, you've got to start young.

(1858 – 1919) 26th U.S. president

To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

I don’t want to lose weight; my tongue and my taste buds are the only friends I got.

American stand-up comedian

Zeal: A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year, and I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

A three-year-old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor

It was tough growing up in Florida because all my friends were retired.

(1959 – ) American comedian, comedy writer, actor & author

Youth: That brief period, as distinguished from childhood or middle age, when the sexes talk to each other at a party.

When you are younger you get blamed for crimes you never committed and when you're older you begin to get credit for virtues you never possessed… it evens itself out.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
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