Subject: Appearance » Body

He's so fat… when he goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.

The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.

She gave me a smile I could feel in my hip pocket.

(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter

All the men in my family are bald, and all the women are hunchbacked – and they don’t know we’re bald.


Brain: The apparatus with which we think we think.

They say an actor is only as good as his parts; well, my parts have done me pretty well, darling.

(1937 – ) English actress

He had one eye, and the popular prejudice runs in favor of two.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist

I speak two languages, Body and English.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

Anyone might become homosexual after seeing Glenda Jackson naked.

(1939 – 2001) British author & journalist

I've seen a topless lady ventriloquist… nobody has ever seen her lips move!

(1927 – ) British comedian, singer & songwriter

My trademarks are a hoarse, grating voice and the face of a retired pugilist: small narrowed eyes set in puffy features which look as though they might, years ago, have lost on points.

(1911 – 1986) American actor

If she wasn’t so skinny, she’d be considered thin.

(1897 – 1960) Russian-born American film director, actor & producer

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don’t stare at it. It’s too risky. Ya get a sense of it and then you look away.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor

The more underdeveloped the country, the more overdeveloped the women.

He's so fat his bathtub has stretch marks.

(1941 – ) American basketball executive

The trouble with nude dancing is that not everything stops when the music stops.

(1909 – 1986) Australian dancer, actor, theater director & choreographer

My body is dropping so fast, my gynecologist wears a hard hat.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

I don't think I'm good in bed; my husband never said anything, but after we made love he'd take a piece of chalk and outline my body.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

The curve is more powerful than the sword.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

My girlfriend told me I had the body of a Greek god and I said you don’t know sh*t about Greek mythology.

(1976 – ) American stand-up comedian

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders… I hate necks.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician

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