Subject: Appearance » Body (Page 4)

I not only get recognized – I get recognized from behind.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Appearance Body

The bigger they are, the harder it is to see your shoes.

Appearance Body Murphy’s Laws

Plastic surgeons are always making mountains out of molehills.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress
Appearance Body Health

Phyllis Diller’s had so many facelifts, there’s nothing left in her shoes.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body

I wear my heart on my sleeve… I wear my liver on my pant leg.


Appearance Body Characteristics Emotions Situations

When I go to the beach, even the tide won't come in.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Appearance Body Self Ugly

That woman's had her face lifted so many times that whenever she raises her eyebrows she pulls up her stockings.

Appearance Body

Penis: Part of the male anatomy which contains the brain.

Body Definitions Men

I belong to a gym now… well, let me rephrase that: I don't belong there at all, but I go.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

It's hard having a big nose… all my pullover shirts have stretch marks.

comedian
Appearance Body

Buster Douglas went to bed as a 231-pound world champion and woke up as a 270-pound parade float.

American sports columnist
Appearance Body Boxing Fat Sports

The other night a mugger took off his mask and made me wear it.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body People Self

He is so fat… when he gets in an elevator, it has to go down.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

If you can’t tell the difference between a spoon and a ladle, then you’re fat.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Appearance Body Fat

Eunuch: One who is cut off from temptation.

Body Definitions

I want to get a tattoo of myself on my entire body, only 2" taller.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body; then I realized who was telling me this.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Body Intelligence

I know [my head] is big because every time I'm in a picture, it always looks like I'm really close to the camera.

Canadian comedian
Appearance Body Self

I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body Ugly

For two hours, some guy followed me around with a pooper scooper.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body People Self

I speak two languages, Body and English.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Body Communication Language