Subject: Beliefs » Honesty

Parents are embarrassed when their children tell lies, and even more embarrassed when they tell the truth.

MSI Owner Denies Lying, Admits Not Telling Truth

… you're so crooked that if you swallowed a nail you'd shit a corkscrew.

(1898 – 1979) British military commander

After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of an automobile accident, you begin to worry about history.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor

Truth is stranger than fiction; fiction has to make sense.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist

Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one’s country.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

When a man tells me he’s going to put all his cards on the table, I always look up his sleeve.

(1893 – 1957) British politician

Fishing is a delusion entirely surrounded by liars in old clothes.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author

I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

Americans detest all lies except lies spoken in public or printed lies.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

Every word she writes is a lie, including "and" and "the."

(1912 – 1989) author, critic & political activist

Science is Truth. Don't be misled by fact.

He’s crooked as a barrel full of fish hooks.

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance.

(1564 – 1616) English dramatist & poet

I Will Respect Your Opinion As Soon As You Stop Making Shit Up!

One could drive a schooner through any part of his argument and never scrape against a fact.

(1866 – 1940) academic, businessman & politician

Nature will tell you a direct lie if she can.

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

There are only two ways of telling the complete truth – anonymously and posthumously.

(1930 – ) economist, social commentator & author