Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Beliefs
(Page 38)
Anything that you have to acquire a taste for was not meant to be eaten.
Eddie Murphy
(1961 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, singer & director
Beliefs
Food/Drink
Opinion
Acquired tastes
A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.
H.L. Mencken
(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics
Government
Honesty
Politicians
Burglars
An exaggeration is a truth that has lost its temper.
Kahlil Gibran
(1883 – 1931) Lebanese-American artist, poet & writer
Beliefs
Truth
Exaggerations
The stopwatch has stopped. It's up to God and the referee now. The referee is Pat Horan. God is God.
Mícheál Ó Muircheartaigh
Irish Gaelic games commentator
God
Sports
Gaelic football
I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road.
Stephen Hawking
(1942 – 2018) English physicist
Beliefs
Life
People
Predestination
I pledge allegiance to the Christian flag, and to the Savior, for whose Kingdom it stands, one Savior, crucified, risen, and coming again, with life and liberty for all who believe.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Beliefs
Misspokements
Religion
Christianity
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on his
not
understanding it.
Upton Sinclair
(1878 – 1968) American author
Beliefs
Intelligence
Understanding
I am not a man of faith, but my wife is.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Beliefs
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Faith
Since a politician never believes what he says, he is quite surprised to be taken at his word.
Charles de Gaulle
(1890 – 1970) French president, general & statesman
Characteristics
Government
Honesty
Politicians
Truth
Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one’s country.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication
Definitions
Language
Lies
Country
Diplomacy
Before arguing with your boss, make absolutely sure you’re right – then let the matter drop.
Anonymous
Beliefs
Arguments
Boss
Liberty: Consists in giving everyone full right to mind everyone else’s business.
Anonymous
Beliefs
Characteristics
Definitions
Liberty
He will even tell a lie when it is not convenient to.
Gore Vidal
(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Beliefs
Honesty
Lies
Richard Nixon
A liberal is a person whose interests aren't at stake at the moment.
Willis Player
Beliefs
Government
Lberals
Man was predestined to have free will.
Hal Luyah
Beliefs
Destiny
Free will
Pop up your hand if you like participating in market research.
Ben TargetMarket research
Beliefs
Opinion
Market research
If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.
Mel Brooks
(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Activities
Beliefs
God
Travel
Flying
If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?
Billy Connolly
(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Beliefs
Characteristics
Religion
Jesus
Names
I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.
Alice Walker
(1944 – ) American author & activist
Beliefs
Colors
Purple
The difference between God and the historians consists above all in the fact that God cannot alter the past.
Samuel Butler
(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Beliefs
God
History
Time
Historians
Euphemism
is a euphemism for lying.
Bobbie Gentry
(Roberta Lee Streeter) (1944 – ) American singer-songwriter
Characteristics
Honesty
Lies
Euphemisms
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