Subject: Characteristics (Page 5)

One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Activities Characteristics Games

Smoking cures weight problems… eventually.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Body Characteristics Death Fat

I'm not Mother Teresa. But I'm also not Charles Manson.

(1966 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Characteristics Sports

You may be a redneck if… your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics People Rednecks

I’m too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I don’t know.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor
Characteristics Communication Sex

The best years are the forties; after fifty a man begins to deteriorate, but in the forties he is at the maximum of his villainy.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Age Characteristics Life

Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics Honesty Truth

If men have a smell it's usually an accident.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Accidents Characteristics Men People

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial.

(1922 – 1990) American actress
Characteristics Misspokements

Diplomacy: To do and say the nastiest thing in the nicest way. 

(1887 – 1938) American journalist, author, editor & lecturer
Characteristics Communication

Self-esteem: An erroneous appraisement.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Definitions

I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Characteristics Children People Things

Silly things do cease to be silly if they are done by sensible people in an impudent way.

(1775 – 1817) English novelist
Characteristics People

He is racist, he's homophobic, he's xenophobic and he's a sexist; he's the perfect Republican candidate.

(1940 – ) talk radio host, political commentator and author
Characteristics Insults

The function of vice is to keep virtue within reasonable bounds.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Characteristics

I'm afraid that fulfilling my potential would really cut into my sitting around time.

(1970 – ) American stand-up comedian & voice actor
Characteristics Time

A hard dog to keep on the porch.

(1947 – ) U.S. Secretary of State, senator (New York) & first lady
Characteristics

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles, the first of which is to be flexible at all times.

(1896 – 1969) American congressman & senator (Illinois)
Characteristics People Self

I think, in most cases, the difference between depression and disappointment is your level of commitment.

(1963 – ) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Health

I was such a nerd in high school, I didn't even have imaginary friends, I had imaginary bullies.

(1966 – ) American actor, musician & comedian
Characteristics People Self

My specialty is detached malevolence.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Characteristics People Self