Subject: Church Bulletins

Church Bulletins:

Unintentionally humorous announcements, passages, blurbs or headlines that have appeared in various church bulletins or printed publications.

This evening's service will be a Sinspiration.

Sermon Blooper: "Let everything that hath breasts praise the Lord!"

Volunteers are needed to spit up food for distribution following the Restaurant Supply Show at the Expo Center.

A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in honor of his wife.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community.

Bilingual Chicken Dinner this Sunday at noon.

When parking on the north side of the church, please remember to park on an angel.

After a study of the book of Philemon we will resume our study of the New Testament.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Helpers are needed! Please sign up on the information sheep.

The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

In case of rain the community prayer vigil will be moved to the Christian Strife Center at Pennington Street Baptist Church.

John Smith, ordained as a deamon, will pastor two churches in Fannin County.

Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

The sermon this morning: Women In the Church. The closing song: Rise Up, O Men of God

The third verse of “Blessed Assurance” will be sung without musical accomplishment.

The Honeymooners are now having bile studies each Tuesday evening at 7:30 p.m.

Missing — A purple lady's bicycle from the church parking lot.

Internet Pornography Sessions Begin Wednesday.

It's Drug Awareness Week: Get involved in drugs before your children do.