Subject: Church Bulletins

Church Bulletins:

Unintentionally humorous announcements, passages, blurbs or headlines that have appeared in various church bulletins or printed publications.

The pastor has a 2001 Mustnag for sale.

Church Bulletins

If you want to be a superhero for God, you could wear a costume, or even nothing at all.

Church Bulletins

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours

Church Bulletins

Mary Ruth Shaunessy is doing well following a procedure which was performed to help relieve abdominal pain at Baylor.

Church Bulletins

Lift up our Messianic brothers and sisters in Israel who are suffering during our prayer time.

Church Bulletins

The Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11.

Church Bulletins

Missing — A purple lady's bicycle from the church parking lot.

Church Bulletins

The scholarship committee is accepting applications for church members attending a Baptist affiliated college this fall. Applications and guidelines are available in the vestibule. The Appalachians should be submitted by July 1st.

Church Bulletins

Mr Brookes will be in the church foyer at the end of today's service. Transport can be provided if required.

Church Bulletins

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Church Bulletins

The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

Church Bulletins

The visiting monster today is Rev. Jack Bains.

Church Bulletins

We are currently running short on mice pies for the church trip, and would be very pleased if you brought us some.

Church Bulletins

Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so.

Church Bulletins

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

Church Bulletins

If you need to heave during the Postlude, please do so quietly.

Church Bulletins

Wednesday, the Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing “Put Me In My Little Bed” accompanied by the pastor.

Church Bulletins

After a study of the book of Philemon we will resume our study of the New Testament.

Church Bulletins

Mr. Bradford was elected and has accepted the office of head deacon. We could not get a better man.

Church Bulletins

Over the massive front doors of a church, these words were inscribed: "The Gates of Heaven." Below that was a small cardboard sign which read: "Please use other entrance."

Church Bulletins

Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Church Bulletins