Subject: Communication » Language (Page 19)

It was strange. The only English words I saw were Sony and Mitsubishi.

American baseball player

I type a 101 words a minute… but it's in my own language.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

About sentence fragments.

Men get laid, but women get screwed.

(1908 – 1999) English writer

There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness.

Diagnosis: A physician's forecast of the disease by the patient's pulse and purse.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together; it was riveting.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

I wonder what the word for dots looks like in Braille.

(1973 – ) American comedian

I keep reading between the lies.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist

Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.

I always confuse the words exotic and erotic; that made for a very awkward conversation at my local pet store.

comic, actor, & writer

To avoid misunderstanding, I’ll stop speaking formal English and just use the binocular.

Boy, those French… they have a different word for everything!

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician