Subject: Communication » Speech

A sophisticated rhetorician, inebriated with the exuberance of his own verbosity.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author

Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)

Too often, people who want to offer sound advice give more sound than advice!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.

(1908 – 1965) American broadcast journalist & newscaster

You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here; you must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

Don’t make a long story short just so you can tell another one.

The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one.

(1922 – 2014) American comic actor & writer

It's strange, isn't it… you stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an airplane, and everyone joins in.

(1921 – 1984) British comedian & magician

Any child who chatters nonstop at home will adamantly refuse to utter a word when requested to demonstrate for an audience.

You will, Oscar, you will.

(1834 – 1903) American-born, British-based artist

I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

All Englishmen talk as if they’ve got a bushel of plums stuck in their throats, and then after swallowing them get constipated from the pips.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Speeches are like babies – easy to conceive but hard to deliver.

Calvin Coolidge didn’t say much, and when he did, he didn’t say much.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

Before I speak, I have something important to say.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

The future will be better tomorrow.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

If that kid don't stop talkin' so much he'll get his tongue sunburned.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)

The splendor of an editor's speech and the splendor of his newspaper are inversely related to the distance between the city in which he makes his speech and the city in which he publishes his paper.

A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.

(1907 – 1973) poet & critic

A full tongue and an empty brain are seldom parted.

(1592 – 1644) English writer

We did not conceive it possible that even Mr. Lincoln would produce a paper so slipshod, so loose-joined, so puerile, not alone in literary construction, but in its ideas, its sentiments, its grasp.