Subject: Communication » Wordplay

The perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.

(1963 – ) Canadian writer, actor & stand-up comedian

Obesity: A surplus gone to waist.

She was another of his near Mrs.

Urinalysis:The study of pissed off people.

If a parsley farmer loses a law suit, do they garnish his wages?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

Time and tide and hookers wait for no man.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck, turns out I phoned dial-a-lama.

(1964 – ) English comedian

Sadist: A person who is kind to a masochist.

Theodore Dreiser should ought to write nicer.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet

If you don't know what introspection is… you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.

(1988 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor

Smuggler: One who neglects his duty to his country.

Judge: A man in a trying position.

Racehorse: A barn athlete.

What's that up the road? … a head?

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

It's not very often you get to see the Lone Ranger and Toronto in the same night.

baseball manager

He was engaged to a contortionist, but she broke it off.

Alarm Clock: That which scares the daylight out of you.

Abstinence makes the heart go wander.

I am his awfully-wedded wife.

(1905 – 1974) radio comedian

My father was a small claims court jester.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

Never in the ring of human conflict have so few taken so much from so many.

American boxer