Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 2)

Invitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

writer
Communication Wordplay

So this cowboy walks in to a German car showroom and he says "Audi!"

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

Avoid fruit and nuts; you are what you eat.

(1945 –) American cartoonist (Garfield)
Eating Food/Drink Wordplay

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Communication Wordplay

My girlfriend’s dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one: She was livid… “What am I going to do with two dead dogs?”

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Animals Dogs Wordplay

Propaganda: Baloney disguised as food for thought.

Definitions Wordplay

Gigolo: A fee-male.

Definitions Wordplay

Will you take this woman to be your awful wedded wife?

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Communication Marriage Wordplay

Oregon leads America in both marital infidelity and clinical depression… what a sad state of affairs.


Communication Wordplay

Quadruplets: Four crying out loud.

Children Definitions Wordplay

The Houston Astros play in a vast indoor stadium known as the Astrodome, but the problem is they field a half-vast team.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports Wordplay

When life gets you down, make a comforter.

American comedian
Communication Wordplay

What Iran needs now is a more modern leader – a mullah lite.

(1973 – ) Iranian-born British comedian
Government Places Wordplay

Reducing: Wishful shrinking.

Appearance Body Definitions Wordplay

History is the short trudge from Adam to atom.

(1904 – 1974) American author & radio producer
History Time Wordplay

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Communication Wordplay

So I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck, turns out I phoned dial-a-lama.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Is ‘tired old cliche’ one?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Hey, if anyone knows how to fix some broken hinges, my door’s always open.

(1987 – ) British comedian
Communication Things Wordplay

My dad suggested I register for a donor card; he’s a man after my own heart.


Communication Wordplay

Coffee: Break fluid.

Definitions Food/Drink Wordplay