Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… he who crosses ocean twice without washing is dirty double crosser.

Confucius say… man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Confucius say… epileptic lettuce farmer makes "seizure salad."

Confucius say… wise man makes sure that his wife's birthday cake is short one candle.

Confucius say… me who sells feminine pads, is crack salesman.

Confucius say… argument between pharmacist and a patient is called a pill owe fight.

Confucius say… Amish woman's secret fantasy is two Mennonite.

Confucius say… Bin Laden like Fred Flintstone, both look out window and see Rubble.

Confucius say… before giving someone a piece of your mind, make sure you have enough to spare.

Confucius say… if you run into your ex on the street, just shift into reverse and keep going.

Confucius say… definition of a true genius is a nudist with a memory for faces.

Confucius say… some fisherman catch their fish by the tale.

Confucius say… man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons.

Confucius say… optimist is a man who hasn't had many experiences yet.

Confucius say… virgin with thimble on finger, never feel prick.

Confucius say… gypsies got no babies because gypsies have crystal balls.

Confucius say… man who drop watch in whisky wasting time.

Confucius say… half of a large intestine is equal to one semicolon.

Confucius say… wife not part of furniture, until screwed on on bed.

Confucius say… who try doggie style sex, won't want to face his wife again.

Confucius say… if you don't want anyone to get your goat, don't let them know where you have it tied.

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