Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… there is one thing that all smart asses have in common… wise cracks

Confucius say… do not argue with spouse who is packing your parachute.

Confucius say… woman who wears padded bra, makes mountains out of molehills.

Confucius say… kiss on the lips is just shopping upstairs for downstairs merchandise.

Confucius say… TV repairman got married, the reception was excellent.

Confucius say… man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.

Confucius say… if you don't believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.

Confucius say… man who make love to exhaust pipe of car have hot rod.

Confucius say… award winning dentist will be given a little plaque.

Confucius say… take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.

Confucius say… man who eat sweets take up two seats.

Confucius say… man who cooks carrots and peas in same pot, very unsanitary.

Confucius say… don't confuse an open mind with one that's vacant.

Confucius say… never tell a one legged hitch hiker to hop in.

Confucius say… fortune you seek is in another cookie.

Confucius say… who try doggie style sex, won't want to face his wife again.

Confucius say… house without toilet is uncanny.

Confucius say… man who put foot in mouth get athlete's tongue.

Confucius say… man who put cream in tart, not always baker.

Confucius say… man with his hands in pockets feels foolish, but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts.

Confucius say… crowded elevator smells different to midget.













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