Subject: Education (Page 2)

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R’s only one begins with an ‘R.’

(1953 – ) comedian, political commentator and television & radio personality
Education Learning

To learn that all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten, I needed to go to grad school.


Education Learning

College was like a four-year game show called “Do My Friends Hate Me or Do I Just Need to Go to Sleep?”

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Education School

Democracy means government by the uneducated, while aristocracy means government by the badly educated.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Democracy Education Government

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Education England Places School

A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.

American football coach
Activities Education Football Misspokements School Sports

I took a positive thinking course… it was shit.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Education Learning

I took a course in speed waiting… now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.


Learning Time

You think when gym teachers are younger, they’re thinking, “You know, I want to teach, but I don’t want to read?”

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Education Occupations Work

Sex doesn’t have to be taught; it’s something most of us are born with.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
School Sex

When I was at school I was great at history… oh wait, no I wasn't.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Education History Learning Time

I was the only black in every class; hard to be absent.

(1969 – ) American comedian & actor
Education

A single conversation with a wise man is better than ten years of study.

Education Learning Proverbs

He who devotes sixteen hours a day to hard study may become at sixty as wise as he thought himself at twenty.

(1880 – ?) American author
Education Intelligence Learning Wisdom

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Education School

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.

Education School

School teachers are not fully appreciated by parents until it rains all day Saturday.

Education Occupations Work

He not only overflowed with learning, but stood in the slop.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Education Insults Learning

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

Education Intelligence Money Murphy’s Laws School Stupidity

College seems like a pretty expensive way to become an alcoholic.

(1974 – ) American comedian
Education School

According to a new geographic literacy study 4 out of 10 American students couldn't find Iraq on a map; however 10 out of 10 Mexicans could find the U.S. without a map.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Education Places