Subject: Entertainment (Page 3)

The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny… yet no French sex comedies are funny.

(1954 – ) cartoonist, screenwriter, producer & creator of The Simpsons

I don’t like this reality television, I have to be honest… I think real people should not be on television; it’s for special people like us, people who have trained and studied to appear to be real.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor

All through the five acts of that Shakespearean tragedy he played the King as though under momentary apprehension that someone else was about to play the Ace.

(1850 – 1895) American writer

Television is like the American toaster, you push the button and the same thing pops up every time.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer

One can’t judge Wagner’s opera Lohengrin after a first hearing, and I certainly don’t intend hearing it a second time.

(1792 – 1868) Italian composer

An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian

Isn't it possible for them to get a real fascist instead of this guy who plays one on TV?

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor

Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

I'm not an actor, and I enclose met press cuttings to prove it.

(1915 – 1999) American stage, film & television actor

Television Programming: Material that fills the time between commercials.

Acting is a form of confusion.

(1903 – 1968) movie actress

Milton was probably the best at dealing with hecklers, but then he probably had the most practice.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

We used to have actresses trying to become stars; now we have stars trying to become actresses.

(1907 – 1989) English actor, director & producer

My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.

(1910 – 1993) editor & novelist

Art, like morality, consists in drawing a line somewhere.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist

Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist

I play the harmonica, but only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

(1962 – ) American author & poet

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

(1946 – ) American comedian

Barbra’s only spontaneous moment in Prince of Tides comes when Nick tosses her a football and she screams “My nails!”

(Paul Rudnick) (1957 – ) Satiric film critic & author