Subject: Entertainment » Television (Page 2)

Hey, Alex – You know the really great thing about television? If something important happens, anywhere in the world, night or day… you can always change the channel.

(1938 – ) American actor

I love sports; whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio.

(1913 – 2006) 36th U.S. president

Dictum on television scripts: We don't want it good – we want it Tuesday.

(1922 – ) English comedy writer & television presenter

Television has brought back murder into the home – where it belongs.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer

You're flickin' around, all of a sudden – boom – you're watching a mole for an hour-and-a-half.

(1972 – ) stand-up comedian & actor

I think TV is very educational; every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

You might be a redneck if… an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

Nobody can ever learn our military's secrets — unless, you know, they happen to have the Discovery Channel… then, it's pretty easy, just tune in for a few minutes.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

Last night, me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back… luckily, I was the one facing the telly.

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian

Remember that show My Three Sons? … it’d be funny if it was called My One Dad.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

Argentina invaded the Falklands because they had ESPN and the Argentines wanted to get the late scores.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator

I can think of nothing more boring for the American people than to have to sit in their living rooms for a whole half hour looking at my face on their television screens.

(1890 – 1969) 34th U.S. president, U.S. Army General

My Comedy Channel – Fox News

My News Channel Comedy Central

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art; now we have something to look down on.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer

Never buy a man a plasma TV until you’re married; a lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don’t need a girlfriend.

(1963 – ) American comedian & author

On the TV screen, pure drivel tends to drive off ordinary drivel.

If it’s attention you want, don’t get involved with a man during play-off season.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

Television enables you to be entertained in your home by people you wouldn't have in your home.

(1939 – ) British journalist, comedian, writer & media personality

You ever look for the remote control and can’t find it, so you just decide, ‘Ah, it looks like I’m not watching TV.”

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight?

disc jockey, screenwriter & humorist

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

(1924 – 1975) American writer, screenwriter & creator of The Twilight Zone
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