Subject: Entertainment » Television (Page 2)

Nobody can ever learn our military's secrets — unless, you know, they happen to have the Discovery Channel… then, it's pretty easy, just tune in for a few minutes.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

I bought a portable cable TV.

comedian

In Russia we only had two TV channels: Channel One was propaganda, Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: “Turn back at once to Channel One.”

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian

As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.

(1936 – ) television talk show host

English Channel: The BBC.

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we’ve got television.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)

Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer

If you have watched a TV series only once, and you watch it again, it will be a rerun of the same episode.

Why should people go out and pay to see bad movies when they can stay home and see bad television for nothing.

(1879 – 1974) film producer

I told them sandwiches.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion

Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.

(1894 – 1956) radio comedian

I don’t like to watch golf on television because I can’t stand people who whisper.

(1936 – 2014) American standup comedian, actor & author

The one function that TV news performs very well is that, when there is no news, we give it you with the same emphasis as if there were.

(1920 – 2003) American television newscaster

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright

Sometimes cameras and television are good to people and sometimes they aren’t; I don’t know if it’s the way you say it, or how you look.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

(1894 – 1956) radio comedian

Remember that show My Three Sons? … it’d be funny if it was called My One Dad.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

My husband went to Radio Shack and got some dog ears for the TV.

I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up… and for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV.

American comedian