Subject: Epitaphs


Humorous, wry or ironic inscriptions from tombs or graves (or a brief statement commemorating or epitomizing) the memory of a deceased person.

Here lies the body of Richard Hind, – Who was neither ingenious, sober, nor kind.

1890. The light of my Life has gone out. – 1891. I have struck another match.

Office upstairs.

Robert Phillip, gravedigger: Here I lie at the Chancel door; Here lie I because I am poor; The farther in the more you pay; Here I lie as warm as they.

In memory of Henry Wang, son of his, Father and mother, John and Maria Wang. Died Dec. 31st 1829 … The first deposit of this yard.

She was not smart, she was not fair, but hearts with grief for her are swellin'; all empty stands her little chair: she died of eatin' water-mellon.

Here lies the man Richard, and Mary his wife, whose surname was Prichard. They lived without strife, and the reason was plain. They abounded in riches, they had no care nor pain, and his wife wore the britches.

Within this grave do lie. Back to back my wife and I. When the last trump the air shall fill, if she gets up I’ll just lie still.

Here lies Bob Master. Faith! t’was very hard to take away an honest Robin’s breath. Yes, surely Robin was full well prepared, for he was always looking out for death.

Here I lie, my name is Ball, I lived, I died, despised by all; and now I cannot chew my crust, I'm gone back to my ancient dust.

Sleep soft in dust, wait the Almighty's will, then rise unchanged, and be an angel still.

This is what I expected, but not so soon.

The death angel struck Alexander McGlue and gave him protracted repose; he wore a checked shirt and a No. 9 shoe And had a pink wart on his nose. No doubt he is happy a-dwelling in space over on the evergreen shore. His friends are informed that his funeral takes place at precisely a quarter past four.

Here lie Walker's particles.

Our Little Charlie – He dropped into our world to taste life’s bitter cup, but turned his little head aside, disgusted with the taste and died.

Blown upward out of sight: he sought the leak by candlelight

How did it get so dark ?!?

He got a fish bone in his throat – And then he sang an angel's note.

Mary, Mary, quite contrary How does your garden grow? Quite well, I bet, Since it's well fed By her body decomposing below.

And this is all that’s left of thee , thou fairest of earth’s daughters. Only four pounds of ashes white, out of two hundred and three quarters.

He looked for gold and died of lead poison

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