Subject: Exaggerations


Humorous overstated descriptions of things or conditions taken to ridiculous extremes.

His car is so expensive the radiator requires Perrier.

She is so fat… she can't even jump to conclusions.

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

He is so old… when he was in school they didn’t teach history!

He is so fat… he has group insurance.

It is so hot… I saw two trees fighting over a dog.

She is so stupid… when you said it was chilly outside she went and got a bowl.

It was so cold… when we milked the cows, we got ice cream.

He is so ugly… when he walks into the bank they turn off the cameras.

He is so fat… his high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph.

He is so stupid… it takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.

It was so cold… flashers were just describing themselves.

She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

The report of my death was an exaggeration.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

He is so ugly… when he throws a boomerang it won’t come back.

It is so hot… I saw a chicken lay a fried egg.

He's so fat… when he goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.

She is so stupid… she took a blood test and failed.

She is so fat… her favorite meal is seconds.

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