Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Exaggerations
(Page 4)
He is so fat… in the summer he can sell shade.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
She is so fat… when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
She is so fat… she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.
Mae West
(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Communication
Exaggerations
Language
It was so cold… the politicians had their hands in their
own
pockets.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
He is so fat… when he steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please."
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child; she must be found and stopped.
Sam Levenson
(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Children
Exaggerations
People
Women
Birth
He is so old… I told him to act his own age, and he died.
Anonymous
Age
Exaggerations
Old
The mosquitoes in Louisiana are so big, they can stand flat foot and screw a chicken!
Anonymous
Animals
Exaggerations
Louisiana
Mosquitoes
She is so fat… when she sits around the house, she sits
around
the house.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
He is so fat… when he gets in an elevator, it
has
to go down.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so hot… today I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
She is so slow… she has to speed up to stop.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
He is so fat… people jump over him rather than go around.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so hot… by the time I got home from buying eggs, I had twelve chicks in the bag.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
She is so old… her dreams are in black and white.
Anonymous
Age
Exaggerations
Old
It is so hot… potatoes cook underground.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It was so cold… when we milked the cows, we got ice cream.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
He is so poor… he can't even pay attention.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Money
Poverty
Page 4 of 6
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