Subject: Exaggerations (Page 5)

He is so fat… he can't even jump to a conclusion.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so old… he owes Jesus a quarter.

Age Exaggerations Old

It is so hot… the trees are whistling for the dogs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

He is so fat… people jump over him rather than go around.

Appearance Exaggerations Fat

He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about him.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

She is so old… she used to baby-sit Jesus.

Age Exaggerations Old

I've seen insects walking around with kneepads.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Animals Exaggerations Places

So windy he could blow up an onion sack.

Communication Exaggerations Expressions Speech

He is so ugly… robbers give him their masks to wear.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

She’s so ugly she makes onions cry.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

It is so hot… I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

He is so fat… when his beeper goes off, people think he's backing up.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so fat… he had his own area code.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so stupid… he got fired from an M&M factory for throwing out all the W's.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

She is so old… she used to baby-sit Jesus.

Age Exaggerations Old

She is so old… her dreams are in black and white.

Age Exaggerations Old

She is so ugly… she has to trick or treat over the phone.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

He is so fat… when he joined Overeaters Anonymous and they make him a chapter.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat