Subject: Food/Drink » Alcohol

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist

I saw a notice that said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started.

(1923 – 1964) Irish poet, short story writer, novelist & playwright

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking… it's easy; I've done it a thousand times.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

There definitely needs to be water on the sidelines for these players, but I also had some Gatorade just in case they were allergic to the water or vice versa.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer

Candy, is dandy, but liquor, is quicker.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet

All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist

Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever.

(450 BC – 388 BC) Greek Athenian comic playwright

They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that ones who drink milkshakes don't win many ball games.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

There are two rules for drinking whisky: first, never take whisky without water, and second, never take water without whisky.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor

AAA-AA: A club for people who are being driven to drink.

Sex with me when I'm really drunk is like being at the dentist… you can tell something's going on but you don't exactly know what it is.

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with it's just compounding the felony.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil's Brew; I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon–and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

It was an arranged marriage, put together by drugs and alcohol.

American comedian & television host

Fields reloading!

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Meet me down in the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

It's quite true I'm not drinking anymore; however, I'm not drinking any less either.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Life is too short to drink cheap beer.