Subject: Government » Elections/Voting

Short-term success with voters on any side of a given issue can be guaranteed by creating a long-term special study commission made up of at least three divergent interest groups.

Hey folks, I’ll admit it — I didn’t vote; I didn’t like any of those bastards enough to risk jury duty.

comedian

If the people of a democracy are allowed to do so, they will vote away the freedoms which are essential to that democracy.

A triumph for democracy; it proves that a millionaire has just as good a chance as anybody else.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

1. Get elected
2. Get re-elected
3. Don’t get mad, get even.

I vote for whoever will annoy my dad.

(1988 – ) English comedian, television presenter & actor

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

Elector: One who enjoys the sacred privilege of voting for the man of another man’s choice.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

A straw vote only shows which way the hot air blows.

William Sydney Porter (1862 – 1910) American writer

The more qualified candidates who are available, the more likely the compromise will be on the candidate whose main qualification is a non-threatening incompetence.

We don’t just have egg on our face; we have omelette all over our suits.

(1940 – ) American television journalist & author

Politicians are always trying to convince you that they can solve the unemployment problem if you'll just give them a job.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

Oscar [of the Academy Awards] is 80 this year, which makes him now automatically the frontrunner for the Republican nomination.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian

Get the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor

You win some, you lose some, and then there's that little known third category.

(1948 – ) U.S. vice president & politician, author & environmentalist

Elections are when people find out what politicians stand for and politicians find out what people will fall for.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

You campaign in poetry, you govern in prose.

(1947 – ) U.S. Secretary of State, senator (New York) & first lady

Elections are when people find out what politicians stand for, and politicians find out what people will fall for.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter; if he ran unopposed he would have lost.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor

I will feel equality has arrived when we can elect to office women who are as incompetent as some of the men who are already there.

daughter of President Ronald Reagan & Jane Wyman

Get re-elected.













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