Subject: Government » Law (Page 4)

Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Characteristics Law People

It's interesting to speculate how it developed that in two of the most anti-feminist institutions, the church and the law court, the men are wearing the dresses.

(1916 – 2000) American lawyer & activist
Appearance Clothing Law Religion Women

When the [Supreme] Court moved to Washington in 1800, it was provided with no books, which probably accounts for the high quality of early opinions.

(1892 – 1954) U.S. Attorney General & Supreme Court justice
Government Law

Convicted criminal: As God is my judge – I am innocent.

Birkett: He isn’t; I am, and you’re not!

(1883 – 1962) British barrister, judge, politician & preacher
Government Law

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

(1923 – 1964) Irish poet, short story writer, novelist & playwright
Government Law Situations

Obscenity is whatever gives the judge an erection.

Law Sex

If law school is so hard to get through… how come there are so many lawyers?

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Education Government Law Lawyers School

Under any conditions, anywhere, whatever you are doing, there is some ordinance under which you can be booked.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Government Law Lawyers

Only lawyers and mental defectives are automatically exempt for jury duty.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Government Law Lawyers

If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire; they're trained for that!

(1964 – ) English comedian
Animals Dogs Government Law

Your honor, may I encroach the bench?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Law Malaprops

I was never ruined but twice; once when I lost a lawsuit and once when I won one.

(1694 – 1778) French author, humanist & satirist
Government Law

The length of time it takes a bill to pass through the legislature is in inverse proportion to the number of lobbying groups favoring it.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws Time

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Law People Speech

Those who express random thoughts to legislative committees are often surprised and appalled to find themselves the instigators of law.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

My retirement plan is a slippery floor at a department store.

American comedian
Law Money

Much as he is opposed to lawbreaking, he is not bigoted about it.

(1990 – 1946) newspaperman & writer
Government Law

The scariest guy in prison is the white guy… because he's guilty.

American comedian
Conflict Crime Law People

The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

(1949 – ) American singer-songwriter, composer & actor
Government Law

Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Congress Food/Drink Government Law