Subject: Hollywood Squares (Page 2)

Peter Marshall: According to a recent article in the Miami Herald, at age 78, is Groucho Marx still interested in sex?

Charley Weaver: Yes, but he’s forgotten the secret word. 

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: President Johnson had a personal butler in the White House; so did presidents Kennedy and Nixon. Does President Ford also have a butler?

Paul Lynde: Yes, he doubles as the Secretary Of Agriculture.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Karen Valentine made her film debut in a film called “Gidget…” Gidget what?

Paul Lynde: Gidget Gets Morning Sickness.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Who never rises for the bride and groom?

Paul Lynde: Ironside.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall:  Paul, where at any one time will you find one quarter of the earth's population?

Paul Lynde: Crossing the Rio Grande.  (He pronounced it "Gran-dee," with emphasis on the first syllable)

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to Dear Abby, it’s nature’s signal that something is wrong. What is it?

George Gobel: When your son starts waxing his legs.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: True or false… manufacturers of ladies’ foundation garments are saying that women’s waists are expanding much faster than their busts or hips.

Carol Channing: How frightening. They’re gonna be bigger than…they’re all gonna be egg-shaped.

(1921 – ) American singer, actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In ancient times, after a battle, the losers would present the winners with a handful of grass.  What did this symbolize?

Paul Lynde: The losers were Mexican!

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Burt Reynolds is quoted as saying, “Dinah (Shore)’s in top form. I’ve never known anyone to be so completely able to throw herself into a…” A what?

Paul Lynde: A headboard.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Will humming help your tennis game?

Florence Henderson: Will humming help my tennis game? Sure, why not? It takes your mind off your balls, or something.

(1934 – 2016) American actress & singer
Hollywood Squares

Peter: Do baby elephants nurse?

Paul Lynde: That’s why you should never go topless on an African beach.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In the Bible, who was found in a basket among the bulrushes?

Paul Lynde: Colonel Sanders.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Your rooster has been fixed so that he no longer has romantic interest in hens. What is the proper word for him now?

Paul Lynde: Suicidal.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: You’re eating chicken, and you notice the bones are very dark.  What does that tell you about the chicken?

David Steinberg: At one time, the chicken had rhythm…

(1942 – ) Canadian comedian, actor, writer, director & author
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In 1914, a new dance was introduced to America that became so controversial that it was barred from college campuses, and ministers preached against it as immoral.  We do it today though.  What dance was it?

Rose Marie: Why do you ask me a question about 1914?!

(1923 – ) American actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: True or false… you can get a camel to be more cooperative by giving it tobacco and perfume.

Rose Marie: You can get an awful lot out of me that way! 

(1923 – ) American actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: You have a bunch of unwanted hair. According to Dr. Thotusen, what is most often the cause of unwanted hair? A bunch of it?

Paul Lynde: Running over a llama.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: When you pat a dog on its head he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do?

Paul Lynde: Make him bark.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?

Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me awake.

(1924 – 2006) American comedic actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: True or false… most personal physical attacks are never reported to police.

Rose Marie: No, I just put them in my diary.

(1923 – ) American actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to flag ettiquette, how does a woman show her respect for the American flag? 

George Gobel: She picks up a sailor.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares