Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Insults
(Page 41)
Don't be so humble – you are not that great.
Golda Meir
(1898 – 1978) Israeli prime minister
Characteristics
Insults
Great
Humble
I love his work but I couldn't warm to him even if I was cremated next to him.
Keith Richards
(1943 – ) English musician, songwriter & member of the Rolling Stones
Insults
About Chuck Berry
Sure, 90% of science fiction is crud; that's because 90% of everything is crud.
Theodore Sturgeon
(1918 – 1985) science fiction author
Books
Insults
Reading/Writing
Criticism
Critics are eunuchs at a gang bang.
George Burns
(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Communication
Insults
People
Criticism
Critics
Uselessness
Judge: Are you trying to show contempt for this court, Mr Smith?
Smith: No, My Lord. I am attempting to conceal it.
F.E. Smith
(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Government
Insults
Court
Judges
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
Groucho Marx
(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Insults
TV/Movie Quotes
As Mr. Hammer in “The Cocoanuts”
He was distinguished for ignorance; for he had only one idea and that was wrong.
Benjamin Disraeli
(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Ideas
Insults
Intelligence
On a politician
Ferrari leads, McLaren second, McLaren second, Jordan third, and Benneton fifth and sixth.
Murray Walker
(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing
Insults
Misspokements
Sports
With his womanly voice, stark white skin and Medusa hair, his gash of red lipstick, heavy eyeliner, almost nonexistent nose and lopsided face, Jackson was making his TV appearance in order to scotch all rumors that he is not quite normal.
Craig Brown
(1957 –) British critic & satirist
Insults
About Michael Jackson
She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.
Alexander Woollcott
(1887 – 1943) theater critic & commentator
Insults
Of Mrs Patrick Campbell
Why don't you trade in your head for a bowling ball?
Groucho Marx
(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Insults
TV/Movie Quotes
As J. Cheever Loophole in “At the Circus”
Come on in, Frank… make yourself at home – hit somebody.
Don Rickles
(1926 – 2017) American stand-up comedian & actor
Insults
Frank Sinatra
The only time he opens his mouth is to change feet.
David Feherty
(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Insults
Speech
About golfer Nick Faldo
About as cuddly as a cornered ferret.
Lynn Barber
(1944 – ) British journalist
Insults
Of English journalist Anne Robinson
Television opened up a whole new field of unemployment for him.
Noel Coward
(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Acting
Entertainment
Insults
Television
Of John Barrymore
You’re a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?
Rodney Dangerfield
(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Insults
TV/Movie Quotes
As Al Czervik in “Caddyshack”
The worst and most homeliest thing to hit the screens since Liza Minelli.
John Simon
(1925 – ) American author and literary, theater & film critic
Insults
About actress Shelley Duvall
You'd think such a little mind would be lonely in such a big head.
Herbert Beerbohm Tree
(1852 – 1917) English actor & theater manager
Insults
Intelligence
Of an actor
She ought to be arrested for loitering in front of an orchestra.
Bette Midler
(1945 – ) singer, actress & comedian
Entertainment
Insults
About Helen Reddy
Performing
Singing
If you were hanging from a ledge by your fingers, he'd stamp on them.
Edward Pearce
(1939 – ) English political journalist & writer
Insults
On James Callaghan
He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
Molly Ivins
(1944 – 2007) newspaper columnist, political commentator, humorist & author
Characteristics
Insults
Page 41 of 42
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