Subject: Intelligence

Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working when you get up in the morning, and doesn't stop until you get into office.

(1874 – 1963) American poet

No one ever went broke in Hollywood underestimating the intelligence of the public.

(1883 – 1963) American writer & hostess

Men and nations will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

If defensive linemen’s IQs were 5 points lower, they’d be geraniums.

American football player

Remember… write to your congressman; even if he can’t read… write to him.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

They put me in Special Ed because they thought I was slow, but I stayed in Special Ed for the ladies.

(1974 – ) Russian-born American comedian, writer & filmmaker

If people do not believe that mathematics is simple, it is only because they do not realize how complicated life is.

(1903 – 1957) Hungarian-American mathematician

Do you follow where I'm coming from?

His mind is so open – so open that ideas simply pass through it.

(1846 – 1924) British idealist philosopher

If your head is wax, don't walk in the sun.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor

I'm concentrating so much I don't know what I'm doing half the time.

British boxer

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer

He don't know shit from peach butter.

If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

Half of the American people have never read a newspaper; and half never voted for president… one hopes it is the same half.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter

There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)

If I ever saw bat shit, I’d be like, ‘that’s crazy.’

(1973 – ) American comedian
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