Subject: Life

If I had my life to live over, I wouldn't have time.

(1936 – 1992) singer, songwriter, musician & actor

Have fun; and go home when you’re tired.

(1887 – 1995) American theater produce, director & playwright, screenwriter & film director

Try everything once except incest and folk dancing.

(1879 – 1961) English conductor

Some of the most well-trodden roads lead nowhere.

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

(1929 – ) American writer

If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z; work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist

I can take reality in small doses, but not as a life style.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older… little things, like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman—stuff you pay good money for in later life.

(1956 – ) American comedian

Life is a game, the object of which is to discover the object of the game.

The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

(1922 – 2003) author & playwright

In spite of the cost of living, it’s still popular.

(1880 – 1966) American novelist

The three things that mean the most to me in life are my parents, Casablanca and college football – not necessarily in that order.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.

(1933 – 1998) comedian & actor

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

(1803 – 1869) French Romantic composer

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats – approximately one billion Chinese couldn’t give a shit.

If you want to get ahead in this world get a lawyer – not a book.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist

The best years are the forties; after fifty a man begins to deteriorate, but in the forties he is at the maximum of his villainy.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

Life is one long process of getting tired.

The Hunger Site