Subject: Life

That's the secret to life… replace one worry with another.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist

You're supposed to eat the cows; they're great big lumbering stupid things – they’d be everywhere if we didn’t eat them.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer

The only thing wrong with immortality is that it tends to go on forever.

(1916 – 1997) newspaper journalist

There are two great rules of life: 1. Never tell everything at once.

(1931 – ) American golfer & broadcaster

All the rudiments of success in life can be found in ironing a pair of trousers.

British boxing champion

Spiritual is the word people use when they mean they want to be covered when they die but they’re not getting up early on a Sunday.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor

People with money live so damn long.

When opportunity knocks, you’ve got headphones on.

You only live once, and the way I live, once is enough.

(1915 – 1998) American singer & actor

It’s a topsy-turvy world, and maybe the problems of two people don’t amount to a hill of beans; but this is our hill… and these are our beans!

(1926 – 2010) Canadian actor

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer

Anybody who tells you that life is brief hasn’t been to motor vehicles recently.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor

Next to Sammy’s life, my life has always appeared dull. Then again, next to a barnacle’s life, my life has always appeared dull.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor

As soon as you’re doing what you wanted to be doing, you want to be doing something else.

Living up to ideals is like doing everyday work with your Sunday clothes on.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

(1907 – 1988) science fiction author

Make Life Your Bitch

I’d rather die while I’m living then live while I’m dead.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & businessman

Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.

Carl Sandburg (1878 – 1967) biographer & poet

This isn’t life in the fast lane, it’s life in the oncoming traffic.

(1948 – ) English novelist

I like life… it's something to do.

comedian