Subject: Life

As you ramble on through life, brother, whatever be your goal: keep your eyes upon the donut, and not upon the hole!

public speaker & teacher

Life: Coming into the world wit nothing, leaving with nothing and, in between, giving everything to the IRS.

All life is 6 to 5 against.

Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.

(1908 – 1999) English writer

It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.

(1950 – ) American science fiction writer, & publisher

Baseball is a lot like life. The line drives are caught, the squibbles go for base hits. It's an unfair game.

American baseball player

Probably the toughest time in anyone’s life is when you have to murder a loved one because they’re the devil.

(1956 – ) American comedian

I owe it all to little chocolate donuts.

(1949 – 1982) American comedian, actor & musician

One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it.

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

Hey I’m high on life, Coach… of course, beer is my life.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor

God always has another custard pie up His sleeve.

(1943 – 2010) English actress

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

(1929 – ) American writer

You're supposed to eat the cows; they're great big lumbering stupid things – they’d be everywhere if we didn’t eat them.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

The game of life is always called on account of darkness.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

As soon as you’re doing what you wanted to be doing, you want to be doing something else.

I intend to live forever – so far, so good.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

I can take reality in small doses, but not as a life style.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
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