Subject: Life

Any man who has $10,000 left when he dies is a failure.

(1909 – 1959) Australian-born American actor
Death Life Money

If you didn’t forget it, it’s the wrong size, backwards, inside out or out of reach.

Life Murphy’s Laws

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Life Music Situations

As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex… except for salami and eggs; now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Eating Food/Drink Life Sex

Aren’t I lucky, to have survived so much bad luck.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Life Problems

If life was a party, he wasn’t even in the kitchen.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Insults Life

Most people my age are dead at the present time.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Age Death Life Misspokements Old People Time

The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil’s own satanic herd!

(1955 – ) English actor
Life Problems TV/Movie Quotes

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

(1927 – 1989) Scottish psychiatrist
Life Sex

In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist
Books Life

Life is a long lesson in humility.

(1860 – 1937) Scottish author, dramatist (creator of Peter Pan)
Life

If I had my life to live over, I wouldn't have time.

(1936 – 1992) singer, songwriter, musician & actor
Life

The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.

(1933 – 1998) comedian & actor
Life Money

If humor was the foundation of my life, men were definitely the first floor.

(1946 – 1989) comedian & actress
Emotions Life Men People

Puberty is a phase… fifteen years of rejection is a lifestyle.

stand-up comedian
Age Life

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Death Life

I think I am, therefore I am… I think.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Intelligence Life

Living is messy.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Life

Everything takes more time and money.

Life Money Murphy’s Laws Time

There is no safety in numbers… or in anything else.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Life Problems

There are three things in life that people like to stare at: a flowing stream, a crackling fire and a Zamboni clearing the ice.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist
Life