Subject: Murphy’s Laws

Murphy’s Laws:

Various “laws,” axioms, principles and observations that usually convey a cynical view of life and an underlying sense of futility. Most do not prove, or even explain anything, but rather simply state a maxim – usually that things will go wrong.

Nature abhors people.

The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the bread.

Certain items which are crucial to a given activity will show up with uncommon regularity until the day when that activity is planned, at which point the item in question will disappear from the face of the earth.

Good judgment comes from experience; experience comes from poor judgment.

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.

If you know something can go wrong, and take due precaution to prevent it, something else will go wrong.

People specialize in their area of greatest weakness.

A high paying rush job comes in only after you've committed to a low paying rush job.

A biscuit takes up moisture when it goes stale and becomes limp; a cake loses moisture and becomes hard.

Decisions are justified by the benefits to the organization, but they are made by considering the benefits to the decision-makers.

You can never do merely one thing.

The one who least wants to play is the one who will win

When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important will be illegible.

For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.

(1966 – ) American magazine editor

1. If you can only do one thing well there is no market for it.

2. You can never do just one thing.

A good review is considered nepotism; a bad one professional jealousy.

Your own car uses more gas and oil than anyone else's.

After a salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you had before.

Push something hard enough and it will fall over.

Any renovation project on an old house will cost twice as much and take three times as long as originally estimated.

The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to… to…

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