Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 82)
View All Murphys Laws
The vehicle in front of you is traveling slower than you are.
Barrett's Laws of Driving II
Autos
Driving
Murphy’s Laws
Science/Weather
Speed
You can get everything dirty without getting anything clean.
Freeman's Extension
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Dirt
If a taxpayer thinks he can cheat safely, he probably will.
Diogenes's Second Dictum
Government
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Taxes
Cheating
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Corollary to the Ike Tautology
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Nostalgia
An inexorable upward movement leads administrators to higher salaries and narrower spans of control.
Riesman's Law
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Administrators
Bureaucracy
Salaries
Facts without theory are trivia. Theory without facts is bullshit.
Beiser’s Brass Tack
Beliefs
Facts
Murphy’s Laws
The most difficult light bulb to replace burns out first and most frequently.
Occam's Electric Razor
Failure
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Light bulbs
Rosten’s First Law: First-rate people hire first-rate people; second-rate people hire third-rate people.
Leo Rosten
(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Murphy’s Laws
People
Work
A taxpayer is someone who does not have to take a civil service exam in order to work for the government.
Krueger's Observation
Government
Murphy’s Laws
Taxes
There is no direct relationship between the quality of an educational program and its cost.
Terman's Law
Education
Money
Murphy’s Laws
If you do something which you are sure will meet with everybody's approval, somebody won't like it.
Chisholm's First Corollary
Murphy’s Laws
Approval
Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.
The Weather-Report Rule
Murphy’s Laws
Science/Weather
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
Harrison's Postulate
Beliefs
Murphy’s Laws
Opinion
Criticism
If you start to clean your desk in the spare bedroom you will probably have to clean the garage to find what you need to finish cleaning the desk.
Watson's Law of Cleaning
Housework
Murphy’s Laws
Cleaning
For every proverb that so confidently asserts its little bit of wisdom, there is usually an equal and opposite proverb that contradicts it.
Proverbial Law
Beliefs
Murphy’s Laws
Proverbs
Contradiction
Every organization has an allotted number of positions to be filled by misfits.Corollary: Once a misfit leaves, another will be recruited.
Owen's Theory of Organizational Deviance
Murphy’s Laws
People
Misfits
Organizations
The amount of time you have to wait for a bus is directly proportional to the inclemency of the weather.
Corcoroni's Second Law of Bus Transportation
Murphy’s Laws
Science/Weather
Bus
Transportation
Any tool when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop.
Anthony's Law of the Workshop
Murphy’s Laws
Places
Things
Corner
Tools
Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average drivers.
Grelb's Reminder
Beliefs
Driving
Murphy’s Laws
Opinion
People
If you did manage to get any good shots, they will be ruined when someone inadvertently opens the darkroom door and all of the dark leaks out.
Third Law of Photography
Murphy’s Laws
Places
Darkroom
Photography
Never conduct negotiations before 10:00 a.m. or after 4:00 p.m. Before 10:00 you appear too anxious, and after 4:00 they think you're desperate.
Eddie's First Law of Business
Murphy’s Laws
Negotiations
Page 82 of 88
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