Subject: People » Men

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist

Marriage is the price men pay for sex, sex is the price women pay for marriage.

One man's folly is another man's wife.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist

Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later, and for another thing, they die earlier.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

A birth-control pill for men, that's fair. It makes more sense to take the bullets out of the gun than to wear a bulletproof vest.

American actor & comedian

If there is anything disagreeable going on, men are sure to get out of it.

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition.

Optimist: The sort of man who marries his sister’s best friend.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

Men and women belong to different species, and communication between them is a science still in its infancy.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor

Women won't even brag about [giving birth]… we men, when we fix a doorknob, drinks are on the house.

(1955 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & impressionist

A woman’s always younger than a man at equal years.

(1806 – 1861) English poet

Bachelor: A man who has faults he doesn’t know about.

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he was single.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

Women are not forgiven for aging; Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles.

(1937 – ) American actress, writer, political activist, & fitness exponent

Gentleman: A man who remembers a woman’s birthday but forgets her age.

Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men.

(1857 – 1924) English (Polish-Ukrainian-born) novelist

The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist

A man who goes into a supermarket for a few items would rather walk around balancing them than put them in one of those little baskets.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

Men get laid, but women get screwed.

(1908 – 1999) English writer

If men have a smell it's usually an accident.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
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