Subject: People » Men

There are three kinda men in the world; there’s men that own rope, men that use eye creme, and that dude from Nickelback.

(1963 – ) American comedian & author

Many a necklace becomes a noose.

(1888 – 1982) American writer

Man has his will, but woman has her way.

(1809 – 1894) physician, professor, lecturer & author

Three stages of sex in a man’s life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

To get a man’s attention, just stand in front of the TV and don’t move… he’ll talk to you, I promise.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner; these men usually have jobs and bathe.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

I want a man who’s kind and understanding; is that too much to ask of a millionaire?

(1917 – ) Hungarian-born American actress

No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes; then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts.

(1963 – ) television host & comedian

Men always want to be a woman's first love; women like to be a man's last romance.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

To attract men, I wear a perfume called New Car Interior.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

In order to make a man or boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.

It is the loose ends with which men hang themselves.

(1900 – 1948) novelist (wife of writer F. Scott Fitzgerald)

Men look at breasts the way women look at babies – 'Aw, isn't that lovely.'

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer

Men like phones with lots of buttons; it makes them feel important.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

A woman who can't forgive should never have more than a nodding acquaintance with a man.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

Men have as exaggerated an idea of their rights as women have of their wrongs.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

… doing what men do normally… bonding… endlessly congratulating each other… and wandering around in small groups looking for something to break…

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist

Do you know how hard it is to find a decent man in this town? Most of them think monogamy is some kind of wood.

movie character in The Mask (Amy Yasbeck)

Confucius say… men are like bike helmets… they are handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly.