Subject: People (Page 118)

Redneck: Popular term for a rustic male, but rarely employed when addressing one in person.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions People

It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Characteristics People

Penis: Part of the male anatomy which contains the brain.

Body Definitions Men

There have been only two geniuses in the world – Willie Mays and William Shakespeare.

(1903 – 1968) movie actress
People

A man leaves a woman for another woman, but a woman leaves a man for herself.


Men People Relationships Women

I have a lot of stories about being a kid because it was the last time I was interesting.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
People Self

You might be a redneck if… you've been on television more than five times describing what the tornado sounded like.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you got Clapper devices controlling the appliances in your house.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

It is the loose ends with which men hang themselves.

(1900 – 1948) novelist (wife of writer F. Scott Fitzgerald)
Men People

You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind legs, but by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men.

(1872 – 1956) English essayist, parodist & caricaturist
Characteristics People

I’m no angel, but I’ve spread my wings a bit.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Life Self

…the difference between old friends and new friends is that new friends just haven't let you down yet.

(1973 – ) American comic book writer & artist
Friends People

Men who can eat anything they want and not gain weight should do it out of sight of women.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Appearance Body Fat Men People Women

In every organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on… and this person must be fired.

Murphy’s Laws People Situations

I was in the supermarket the other day, and I met a lady in the aisle where they keep the generic brands; her name was “woman.”

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
People Women

It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us.


People Places

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink People

You're looking for a lump in a bag of lumps… that can take some time.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Health Men People

You might be a redneck if… your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Divorce Marriage People Rednecks Relationships

Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Beliefs Girls Situations

Sometimes I’m so sweet even I can’t stand it.

(1935 – ) British actress, singer & author
People Self