Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Reviews/Criticism
Reviews/Criticism:
Biting reviews and criticism of film, theater, television, music, books etc.
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions – the curtain was up.
Groucho Marx
(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Reviews/Criticism
Adverse conditions
Also George S. Kaufman
You know when sometimes a film catches fire inside a projector? If it happened with this one, I suspect the audience might cheer.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
Review of “Revolver”
Which is he playing now?
W. Somerset Maugham
(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Reviews/Criticism
Watching Spencer Tracy on the set of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
“This sucks on so many levels.” — Dialogue from Jason X. Rare for a movie to so frankly describe itself.
Jason X
sucks on the levels of storytelling, character development, suspense, special effects, originality, punctuation, neatness and aptness of thought.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Jason X”
The movie’s just such a pain in the ass.
Matt Pais
American movie critic
Reviews/Criticism
“The Kings of Summer”
Boat Trip
arrives preceded by publicity saying many homosexuals have been outraged by the film. Now that it's in theaters, everybody else has a chance to join them. Not that the film is outrageous. That would be asking too much. It is dim-witted, unfunny, too shallow to be offensive…
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Boat Trip”
Blamelessness runs riot though the six hundred pages.
John Vincent
(1937 – ) British historian
Reviews/Criticism
Of Kenneth Harris’s biography “Attlee”
His pictures seem to resemble not pictures but a sample book of patterns of linoleum.
Cyril Asquith
(1890 – 1954) British critic
Reviews/Criticism
Paintings
Oh come on. Like you couldn’t smell this turkey rotting from miles away.
Rob Vaux
writer, editor & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
“The Scorpion King”
“House Beautiful”
is the play lousy.
Dorothy Parker
(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism
On a theater marquee
The play “House Beautiful”
The entire film seems to consist of three thoughts, cycled ad nauseum: Don’t leave me. I can’t live without you. Make me a vampire.
Rubin Safaya
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“The Twilight Saga: New Moon”
More dreadful than dangerous.
Spyder Darling
musician & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
Of the movie “Dangerous Game”
When you’ve seen all of Ionesco’s plays… you’ve seen one of them.
Kenneth Tynan
(1927 – 1980) English theatre critic & writer
Reviews/Criticism
Playwright Eugène Ionesco
Leave it to Hollywood to take a bad idea and make it terrible.
Rubin Safaya
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“My Life in Ruins”
Then Gil and Noel sung a charming duet of “Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better”. They were both wrong.
Kelsey Grammer
(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer
Reviews/Criticism
TV/Movie Quotes
As Frasier Crane in “Frasier”
It’s truly rare that you see this level of insightful childhood psychoanalysis in a film about a basketball-playing dog.
Mr. Cranky
(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism
“Air Bud”
If
Planes
were a reasonably priced download, you'd gladly use it to sedate your kids during a long car ride.
Rafer Guzman
journalist & film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“Planes”
This is either bad writing, bad direction, bad acting or a combination of the three.
Rubin Safaya
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3”
If you hear a door slam in the theater, you'll know that Elvis has left the building – in disgust.
Stephanie Zacharek
American film critic
Reviews/Criticism
Of “3000 Miles to Graceland”
There’s not a scene… that isn’t awful.
Mark Palermo
American writer & film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“Because I Said So”
Speaking of things that'll make your head explode,
Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story
finally made it to the drive-in.
Joe Bob Briggs
(John Bloom) (1953 – ) American film critic, writer & actor
Reviews/Criticism
“Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story”
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