Subject: Sports » Baseball (Page 5)

You have to have a catcher because if you don’t you’re likely to have a lot of passed balls.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

Ozzie makes a leaping, diving stop, shovels to Fernando and everybody drops everything.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

All the Padres need is a fly ball in the air.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

My idea of managing is giving the ball to Tom Seaver and sitting down and watching him work.

(1934 – 2010) American baseball manager

My problem is I lose too many one-run games – 10-9, 8-7.

American baseball pitcher

The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game, it’s that they stay out all night looking for it.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

Edwards missed getting Stearns at third base by an eyeball.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

Yes, and so is everyone else in the league.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

We’ll be back after this word from Manufacturer’s Hangover.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

That was a maximization of a minimization of hits.

professional baseball player

A fellow has to have faith in God above and Rollie Fingers in the bullpen.

(1922 – ) American baseball player & manager

I'm the gooney bird that walked to the bank. I'm doing better than most of those guys who said I was crazy.

(1929 – ) American baseball player who had a well-publicized bipolar disorder

A woman will be elected president before Wade Boggs is called out on strikes.

(1953 – ) American baseball player

A lot of things run through your head when you’re going in to relieve in a tight spot… one of them was, “Should I spike myself?”

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player

The hitter asks the owner to give him a big raise so he can go somewhere he's never been, and the owner says "You mean third base?"

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian

When they operated, I told them to put in a Koufax fastball. They did, but it was Mrs. Koufax's.

professional baseball pitcher

The way to make coaches think you’re in shape in the spring is to get a tan.

American baseball player

The only reason we’re 7-0 is because we’ve won all seven of our games.

Baseball team manager

My biggest problem in the big leagues is that I can't figure out how to spend forty-three dollars in meal money.

baseball player

I was so bad, I couldn’t have driven Miss Daisy home.

baseball player

There is someone warming up in the Giants’ bullpen, but he’s obscured by his number.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer