Subject: Sports (Page 3)

Magic Johnson is the best player who plays on the ground, and Michael Jordan is the best player who plays in the air.

American basketball player

(Willie) McCovey swings and misses, and it’s fouled back.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

It gets late out there early.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager

I'm actually getting to sleep before I have breakfast.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor

The Mets just had their first .500 or better April since July of 1992.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.

Anglo-Irish golfer

Everyone is unhappy at times, even my wife. Only she doesn't get interviewed about it.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Colin Meads is the kind of player you expect to see emerging from a ruck with the remains of a jockstrap between his teeth.

Papua New Guinean rugby player

The smaller the ball used in a sport, the better the book.

And Michael Schumacher is actually in a very good position… he’s in last place.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator

The best time to play a freshman is when he is a junior.

Minnesota football coach

We were so poor a robber once broke into our house and we ended up robbing the robber.

American football player

I read the greens in Spanish, but putt in English.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer

If a coach starts listening to the fans, he ends up sitting next to them.

professional basketball player & coach

You’d be a overweight neurotic fighter too if your name was Shirley Crabtree.

My foot said go before my brain did.

top fuel drag racer

From the waist down, Earl Campbell has the biggest legs I have ever seen on a running back.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer

I may be the only golfer never to have broken a single putter; if you don't count the one I twisted and threw into a bush.

American sportswriter

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns.

[Coach Vince] Lombardi treats us all the same… like dogs.

professional football player

Say you were standing with one foot in the oven and the other foot in a bucket of ice; according to the percentage people, you should be about perfectly comfortable.

baseball manager