Subject: Sports (Page 3)

I was offered a spot in an ad for neutering pets… not exactly what I had in mind.

American baseball pitcher
Baseball Sports

Mansell handles corners better than Maradona.

Auto racing Signs Sports

I’m a 4-wheel-drive pickup type of guy… so is my wife.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports

Football is a game played with arms, legs and shoulders but mostly from the neck up.

(1888 – 1931) American football player & coach
Football Sports

 When I'm on the road, my greatest ambition is to get a standing boo.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

I play football. I’m not trying to be a professor. The tests don’t seem to make sense to me, measuring your brain on stuff I haven’t been through in school.

Football Misspokements Sports

I can airmail the golf ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Reporter: Will you be rooting for the American League or National League in the All Star Game?

Dole: Probably.

(1923 – ) U.S. senator (Kansas) & presidential candidate
Baseball Misspokements Sports

God said to Faldo, as He once said to Nicklaus, "You will have the skills like no other." Then he whispered to Ballesteros, as he whispered to Palmer, "But they will love you more."

American sportswriter
Golf Sports

He knocks the hell out of people, but in a Christian way.

professional football player & coach
Beliefs Football Sports

If I knew the answer to that I'd bet $10,000 on the game and retire from coaching.

Montreal Canadiens coach
Hockey Sports

I asked my doctor how many more years I have left and he said, 'You're too ornery to die.'

(1929 – ) American baseball player who had a well-publicized bipolar disorder
Baseball Death Sports

Our strength is that we don’t have any weaknesses; our weakness is that we don’t have any real strengths.

College football coach
Football Sports

Most football players are temperamental… that’s 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental.

professional football player
Football Sports

Some guys are inwardly outgoing.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Sports

It sure didn't make me the million dollars people said it would, but it sure made my ex-wife happy.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

When I was recruited at Auburn, they took me to a strip joint; when I saw those titties on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met my academic requirements.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

The day I got a hit off Sandy Koufax was when he knew it was all over.

(1934 – 2010) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

[boxing promoter] Bob Arum is one of the worst people in the western hemisphere. I don't know the eastern hemisphere very well, but I suspect he'd be one of the worst people there too, if he went.

boxing manager & trainer
Boxing Insults Sports

I'm okay. Russian machine never breaks.

Russian hockey player
Hockey Sports

With ten [laps]to go, I didn't have a code of ethics.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports