Subject: Time » Future

You always say 'I'll quit when I start to slide,' and then one morning you wake up and realize you done slid.

(1921 – 1989) American boxing champion

Future: That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

What Orwell failed to predict was that we’d buy the cameras ourselves… and that our biggest fear would be that nobody was watching.

I would not say that the future is necessarily less predictable than the past; I think the past was not predictable when it started.

(1932 – ) American businessman & U.S. Secretary of Defense

What happens when the future has come and gone?


In the year 3000, everything will be instant… but the DMV will still take, like, nine f**king seconds.

(1972 – ) stand-up comedian & actor

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist

Worrying about the future is a thing of the past.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

(1899 – 1995) humorist

The future ain’t what it used to be.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager

If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract – teach him to deduct.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist

Tomorrow: What always comes but never arrives.

We don’t want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

A hotel mini-bar allows you to see into the future and what a can of Pepsi will cost in 2020.

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician

I often think about my future wife and how lax she's been about getting in touch with me.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian

Why should I do anything for posterity? … what has posterity ever done for me?

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

Let me just tell you how thrilling it really is, and how, what a challenge it is, because in 1988 the question is whether we’re going forward to tomorrow or whether we’re going to go past to the – to the back.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

The future will be better tomorrow.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president

I look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

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