Subject: Time » History

Historian: An editor of yesterday’s news.

History is more or less bunk.

(1863 – 1947) automobile industrialist

What history teaches us is that men have never learned anything from it.

(1770 – 1831) German philosopher

After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of an automobile accident, you begin to worry about history.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor

Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter.

(1860 – 1954) English author, Anglican priest, professor & dean

He who warned, uh, the British that they weren’t gonna be takin’ away our arms, uh, by ringing those bells, and um, makin’ sure as he’s riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author

The past actually happened but history is only what someone wrote down.

(1952 – ) American writer & comedian

I grew up in Europe… where the history comes from.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor

The great themes of Canadian history are as follows: Keeping the Americans out, keeping the French in, and trying to get the Natives to somehow disappear.

(1964 – ) Canadian writer & novelist

Traditions are group efforts to keep the unexpected from happening.

American business woman & magazine editor

Those who learn nothing from history are condemned to rewrite it.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor

History is the sum total of things that could have been avoided.

(1876 – 1967) German statesman

History repeats itself; historians repeat one another.

(1887 – 1915) English poet

All modern men are descended from a wormlike creature… but it shows more on some people.

(1884 – 1949) American humorist & literary critic

 It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

What men learn from history is that men do not learn from history.

History repeats itself; historians repeat each other.

(1889 – 1944) English historian

My ancestors didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they were there to meet the boat.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

You always think another time would have been ideal for you; the reality is there was no novocaine when you went to the dentist.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

(1915 – 2002) Israeli diplomat & politician

Historical fancy is more persistent than historical fact.