Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Classified ad
Genuine Imitation Jungle Boots
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Fresh-Cut CHRISTMAS TREES Arriving December 28th – We Carry the Fullest Freshest Trees Available…
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Turkey Shoot Slated – The Malheur Gun Club will hold a turkey shoot Sunday at the Vale Airport… Winners will receive hams.
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Earn up to $30,000 – and more!
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Free Yorkshire terrier. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.
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Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
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Signs
DO YOU USE COUPONS? Up to $20 worth FREE Grocery Coupons. Choose From over 1,200 Name Brands. Grocery Coupon Book $24.95
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Harrisburg Postal Employees Gun Club
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Public notice
Car Sitting Services: Are you going away for a long trip? Are you afraid your car will be lonely, or worse yet, stolen!? I can protect your car and take it for long drives to keep it company. I can even drop you off and pick you up at the airport using your car (at my convenience)! Cheap rates! Call [telephone] and ask for One-tooth Tony.
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WE FEATURE Indoor Shooting Range – E-Z Layaway Program – Concealed Carry Classes – Full Line Security Leather – Machine Gun Rentals – Certified NRA Instructors…
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Free Puppies: part German shepherd, part stupid dog.
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Animals
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Dogs
FOUND: Large, Obese Goldfish, 11 years old, blind as a bat
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If you have over forty eyes and have noticed how your vision has changed…
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Health
Vision
Will the person who got hit in the head with a tomato in the 1950’s please contact (414) 453…
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Free 1 can of pork & beans w/ purchase of 3BR 2 bath home.
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Dear recently-expired subscriber…
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From a request for a magazine subscription renewal
TALKING DOG, speaks 4 languages, only $50. 309-693-….
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LOST – WEDDING RING, men’s, Hooters’s parking lot, 6/27, Reward! Call…
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A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
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MOVING SALE – EVERYTHING IS FREE AND MUST GO IMMEDIATELY!!! ITEMS ALREADY AT THE CURB FOR CONVENIENT LOADING!!!
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SPANISH TOOTER NEEDED FOR A 7 year old student, learn to speak and write fluently. Call after 6 pm. 467-….
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