Author: Abe Lemons

[I employ] two offenses: the GMA, or "general milling around," and the Daylight Offense, as in "The first guy who sees daylight after he crosses mid-court shoots."

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot; finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

I play my regulars; the only way a guy gets off the floor is if he dies.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

I don't jog; if I die I want to be sick.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

This players getting taller thing is getting out of hand. What we need to do is sink the baskets into the floor at each end of the court and recruit midgets.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

How hard is it to coach track? … tell ‘em to stay to the left and get back as fast as you can.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

One day of practice is like one day of clean living; it doesn’t do you any good.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

You out rebounded a dead man by one.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

How can you call a foul on my man for using his eye to foul the other team’s player on his elbow?

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

Doctors bury their mistakes, but mine are still on scholarship.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

It was the toughest seven-man zone we faced all year.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

You may be big in New York, but in Walters, Oklahoma, you're nobody.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

If you had come with me, you could be the principal of a high school by now.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

Just give every coach the same amount of money and tell them they can keep what’s left over.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

We went to Alaska once and they made us honorary Alaskans. Then we went to Hawaii and they made us honorary Hawaiians. We're going to the Virgin Islands this year.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

 You mean in the state?

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

Hey, some places this would be a foul!

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

They wanted to buy out my contract, but I couldn’t make change for a $20, so they had to let me stay

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

You can say something to popes, kings and presidents, but you can't talk to officials. In the next war they ought to give everyone a whistle.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

I’m not playing favorites… all my favorites have graduated.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach