Author: Ambrose Bierce

Reconsider: To seek a justification for a decision already made.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Yesterday: The infancy of youth, the youth of manhood, the entire past of age.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Barometer: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Auctioneer: The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Secret: What we tell everybody to tell nobody.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Take: To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Bore: A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Genealogy: An account of one’s descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his own.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

War is God's way of teaching us geography.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Wedding: A ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Kill: To create a vacancy without nominating a successor.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Birth: The first and dirtiest of all disasters. 

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Twice: Once too often.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Teetotaler: One who abstains from strong drink, sometimes totally, sometimes tolerably totally.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Selfish: Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Intimacy: A relation into which fools are providentially drawn for their mutual destruction.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Dependent: Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Fidelity : A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist













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