Author: Jeff Foxworthy Page 2

You might be a redneck if… you go to the family reunion to meet women.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you've got more than three cousins named 'Bubba'.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you have more belt-buckles than pants.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you have a close relative named "Cletus.”

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… your school fight song is Dueling Banjos.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there is a law against it.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you’re banned from the Memphis Zoo because you disturb the monkeys.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… your last year you hid yer kids' Easter eggs under cow pies.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you think 'N Sync is where the dirty dishes go.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… your `huntin dawg' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you got Clapper devices controlling the appliances in your house.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin’ contest.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

You might be a redneck if… the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality