Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Jeff Foxworthy Page 2
You might be a redneck if… you go to the family reunion to meet women.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Women
Family reunions
If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Entertainment
People
Rednecks
Television
You might be a redneck if… you believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink
People
Rednecks
Beef jerky
Moon Pies
You might be a redneck if… you think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Things
Bathroom fixtures
Hot tub
You might be a redneck if… you've got more than three cousins named 'Bubba'.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Family
People
Rednecks
Bubba
Cousins
You might be a redneck if… you have more belt-buckles than pants.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance
Clothing
People
Rednecks
Belt-buckles
Pants
You might be a redneck if… you have a close relative named "Cletus.”
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Cletus
You might be a redneck if… you can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Trucks
You might be a redneck if… your school fight song is Dueling Banjos.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
School
Dueling Banjos
You might be a redneck if… ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there is a law against it.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Government
Law
Marriage
People
Rednecks
You might be a redneck if… your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Daycare
Prom
You might be a redneck if… you’re banned from the Memphis Zoo because you disturb the monkeys.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals
People
Places
Rednecks
Monkeys
Zoo
You might be a redneck if… you think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Money
People
Rednecks
Stocks
You might be a redneck if… your last year you hid yer kids' Easter eggs under cow pies.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals
People
Rednecks
Cow pies
Easter eggs
You might be a redneck if… you think 'N Sync is where the dirty dishes go.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Entertainment
Music
People
Rednecks
'N Sync
Dishes
You might be a redneck if… your `huntin dawg' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals
Dogs
Money
People
Rednecks
Things
Trucks
You might be a redneck if… you got Clapper devices controlling the appliances in your house.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Appliances
Clapper
You might be a redneck if… you've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Funerals
Trucks
You might be a redneck if… you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin’ contest.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities
People
Rednecks
Tobacco spittin’
You might be a redneck if… your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People
Rednecks
Show and Tell
You might be a redneck if… the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.
Jeff Foxworthy
(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Entertainment
Music
People
Rednecks
Conway Twitty
Earthquakes
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