Author: Jeff Foxworthy Page 4

You might be a redneck if…… you think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People

You might be a redneck if… Mailpouch sends you Christmas cards.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Money People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Autos People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… one of your kids was born on a pool table.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Situations

You might be a redneck if… your daughter's Barbie Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things

You might be a redneck if… your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Divorce Marriage People Rednecks Relationships

You might be a redneck if… you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities People Rednecks Television

You take a normal guy, give him a wife, give them time, and you've got AN IDIOT!

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Fools Husbands Intelligence Marriage Wives

When I was in high school, a “drive-by shooting” meant someone had their rear end hanging out a car window!

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities Age Young

You might be a redneck if… you’re banned from the Memphis Zoo because you disturb the monkeys.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals People Places Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Marriage People Rednecks Relationships

I’ve been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks; the rest of them take after the other side of the family.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
America Characteristics Family Fathers People Places

You might be a redneck if… you take your dog for a walk and you both use the tree at the corner.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals Dogs People

You might be a redneck if… you think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things Wives

You might be a redneck if… you have the electronic singing fish in more than three rooms in your house.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things

You might be a redneck if… you believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things

You might be a redneck if… three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Clothing People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… the FBI surrounded your trailer park twice so far this year.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks