Keyword: As Al Czervik in “Caddyshack”

Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

[breaks wind at a dinner] Whoa, did somebody step on a duck?

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

He tried to choke me! You saw it. He called me a baboon, thinks I’m his wife.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

And this is your grandson, huh? Oh, wonderful boy! Yeah, he’s a good boy. Now I know why tigers eat their young.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must’ve been something before electricity.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

Hey everybody, we’re all gonna get laid!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. What, when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup, huh?

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

You’re a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

[tees off] Fore! [his ball hits Judge Smails in the crotch] … I should have yelled, “Two!”

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor