Keyword: Britain

Britons put up with, Americans fix, while Canadians cope.

(1901 – 1978) anthropologist

England is the only country in the world where the food is more dangerous than the sex.

(1934 – ) comedian

British people would die for their right to drink themselves to death.

(1977 – ) British political comedian & television host

I asked the barmaid for a quickie; the man next to me said, 'It's pronounced quiche.'


You’re probably aware that Britain stopped evolving gastronomically around the year 1242.

(1977 – ) British political comedian & television host

The best research [for playing a drunk] is being a British actor for 20 years.

(1933 – ) English actor

In a British hotel, the words “Can I help you sir?” mean roughly: “What the hell do you want?”

(1922 – 1995) English novelist & poet

I want to succeed in America where, unlike Britain, they do not regard ambition as being the same as eating babies.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor

Canadians have been so busy explaining to the Americans that we aren't British, and to the British that we aren't Americans that we haven't had time to become Canadians.

Canadian writer & speaker