Keyword: Diets

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first;l by the second day, you’re off it.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

(1902 – 1971) American comedian & singer

That's like the Queen Mary losing a deck chair.

(1928 – 2001) American basketball coach

Calorie: Basic measure of the amount of rationalization offered by the average individual prior to taking a second helping of a particular food.

We were the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the world, and with more diets to keep us from eating it.

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks.

(1930 – 1978) American comedian

Nowadays, a balanced diet is when every McNugget weighs the same!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

Diets are for those who are thick and tired of it.

Another good reducing exercise consists in placing both hands against the table edge and pushing back.

(1887 – 1948) American journalist & humorist

She used to diet on any kind of food she could lay her hands on.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist

Confucius say… Diet: food that make other people lose weight.

A diet is a system of starving yourself to death so you can live a little longer.

(1930 – 1978) American comedian

Those magazine dieting stories always have the testimonial of a woman who wore a dress that could slip-cover New Jersey in one photo and thirty days later looked like a well-dressed thermometer.

(1918 – 2007) American humor writer

I’m on a seafood diet… I see food, I eat it.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress

Dieting is not a piece of cake.

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

(1897-1987) actress & comedian

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first; by the second day you're off it.

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor

No matter what I do, I cannot lose this 18 pounds… I mean I have tried everything short of diet and exercise.

American stand-up comedian
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