Keyword: Injuries

I grabbed it and squeezed it back into place. It gave a little crunch and popped right in.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Fortunately, Paul Scholes’ injury wasn’t as bad as we’d hoped for.

English football player & analyst
Colemanballs

While playing golf today I hit two good balls… I stepped on a rake.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Golf Sports

(Bruce) Benedict may not be hurt as much as he really is.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Sports

I wouldn’t ever set out to hurt anybody deliberately unless it was, you know, important – like a league game or something.

professional football player
Football Sports

Women and elephants never forget an injury.

Intelligence Memory Murphy’s Laws Women

The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing somebody’s cast.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Health Insults

Bill Walton is incredible; if you drop a toothpick on his foot, he'll have a stress fracture.

American basketball coach
Basketball Health Sports

This type of injury is very painful. Especially when it hurts.

Canadian hockey coach
Hockey Misspokements Sports

A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

Military

Injuries above the neck don’t count.

Australian football coach
Sports

If I get run into again, I'm taking someone with me. I lost one knee. I'll take a head if it happens again.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Hockey Sports

The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing somebody's cast.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Health Insults Situations

The seriousness of a wound (in a firefight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.

Military

Dumbarton player Steve McCahill has limped off with a badly cut forehead.

Colemanballs

And he’s got the icepack on his groin there, so it’s possibly not the old shoulder injury.

English rugby player & commentator
Misspokements Sports

In my time, I've had my knee out, broken my collarbone, had my nose smashed, a rib broken, lost a few teeth, and ricked my back; but as soon as I get a bit of bad luck I'm going to quit the game.

Sports

They’ve taken the foot off Johnny Grubb… uh, they’ve taken the shoe off Johnny Grubb.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports